Battle Report: Being Picked On By Dark Eldar

So, a while ago, I got a battle in against a friend of mine playing the new Dark Eldar Codex. I was biblically slack about getting it written up, but here it is, finally!

There was a definite disparity as far as the board was concerned - my deployment zone was full, while his had some small squads and a smattering of Talos.

And this is taking into account I had a whole bunch of assassins.

They were scattered all over the table.

With the Vindicare being in a good spot to put holes in things.

The Callidus, meanwhile, jumped out in the enemy deployment zone for extra mayhem.

Soon enough, the assassins were in combat with the Talos. It turns out, they're not very good at killing monstrous creatures.

The Eversor was rolling terribly. He should probably have been able to get one.

And then, webway portals with a Raider full of Grotesques with Liquifiers.

And then there's one less squad.

The command HQ bail out of their wrecked Chimera.

The Ratlings try very hard not to be threatening.

Meanwhile, one of the squads on the flank goes to hold up a Talos, which has dispatched the assassin facing it.

There will shortly follow a demonstration of why masses of template weapons suck for Guard.

This was one shooting phase.

Most of the Command Squad are dead, the Guardsmen are in combat with a Talos.

They manage to hold it off OK.

The Vindicare takes a shot at the Dark Eldar Warlord, hoping for a cheap victory point.

But a squad of Incubi are on the way to put paid to his efforts.

The last Guardsmen on the board before the tabling are the ones facing the Talos.

All in all, I was outplayed and out list designed. I had nothing that could deal with Talos, and nothing to deal with deep striking Grotesques. I've not played 40K since this game - I'm still trying to think of something that Guard have which can deal with this design of list. I'm kind of stuck.